Sometimes, it really doesn't feel worth it to try to be a productive member of society. People like me work their asses off to become professionals and help society and we get fucked the whole way by the very system that's meant to produce productive people like us. I believe the world needs their retail workers, burger flippers, and similarly low skill jobs. But how does the world treat those of us who want to go the extra mile to be the doctors, lawyers, and engineers who try to benefit humanity? Like shit. Sure there are people who only do it for the big salary. But what about the people who actually care?
I'm not even in grad school yet and I'm already thinking, "Fuck humanity." I want to be a physical therapist. I want to help people who are plagued with unrelenting pain. I want to provide them with support, understanding, and a way to stop the pain.
Can I do that for you, people of the United States? No.
I have to get a bachelor's degree.
I have to take additional classes for program requirements.
I have to work/volunteer at different clinic settings.
I have to schmooze over therapists and professors for letters of recommendation.
I have to take a grad school exam because my bachelor's degree isn't enough proof that I'm ready for the next step.
I have to have $100,000~ or be willing to pay off student loans until my children go to college.
I have to pray that I get accepted into the 50 person program over the hundreds of other people with the same aspiration.
I have to sacrifice three years of my life to do nothing but study, eat ramen noodles (if I can afford them), and possibly develop a caffeine addiction.
I have to pray that I pass all of the expedited classes so I can get out of Hell on time.
I have to pay to take a license test in order to actually practice on people.
I have to get hired as fast as fucking possible before the loan payments make me homeless.
The worst part is, there doesn't seem to be a way to remedy this murderous cycle. All of the mentioned steps will collectively help shape people like me to be the professionals we strive to be. In summary, all we have to give for the education and opportunities of a professional is our happiness.
(This is the part you really shouldn't read unless you honestly care about my personal situation).
I currently work at a PT clinic. It's not a bad place but the people can be assholes and I wasn't too happy to learn I'm earning less than the lowest paid 10% of people with the same job as me. I might be happier somewhere else. But I can't leave. I know the therapists I work with now will write me a letter of recommendation. The Golden Ticket(s) for aspiring graduate students.
In my state, there are two PT programs. One in the heart of Baltimore, which I've heard terrible things about, and one on the Eastern Shore, which I realistically can't meet the requirements for. I could put up with awful traffic and risk getting gang-banged everyday if I want to stay within the comfort of my home state. But I hate Maryland anyway. So screw that plan.
That leaves me with 49 other states to choose from (plus other countries if I'm really feeling ambitious). Here's the part where I get obnoxiously picky. I hate the south. I hate the cold. I hate the mid-west. I hate most of the east coast.
Here's what makes it even more tricky. My boyfriend and I plan on getting married. We have completely different career aspirations that will no doubt force us to go places we wouldn't even think of yet. I have yet to find an easy way to search for reputable PT programs I have a chance of getting into that are within thirty minutes of a Lego store.
What makes it even worse is that I'll probably finish undergrad before him. So I get to play the psychic and try to figure out what would be most convenient for him job-wise and most likely to keep us in the same state.
Assuming I do pick right or he puts his aspirations on hiatus for my sake, grad school will undoubtedly stab maliciously at our blossoming marriage. While I'm busy not having a job, not sleeping, and literally living off of my blood, sweat, and tears, he'll try to calm me down and be romantic. Me, being the raging bitch who can't handle stress, won't stand for that. I hope he's in the mood to get married, and then deal with the not-me me for three-ish years.
And that's the end of my rant. About damn time. Dan, I'm sorry if this makes you upset. But this was highly therapeutic for me.
Moral Haiku:
I wrote a haiku.
Education really sucks.
Ok... done bitching.
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